High Score

March 27, 2025

When I was a pre-teen in Cranford, NJ, I played baseball in my town’s Little League. I could have played girls' softball, but I decided that a girl of the ’80s should be tough enough to play with the boys. My league focused more on fun than on training for the majors, but even so, I was the worst player on the team. The coach, Danny Patalano’s dad, kindly placed me in right field; he was lovely to all of us and I had a lot of fun playing even if I rarely connected with the ball. I suspect Mr. Patalano privately wished I’d find a nice music group instead, and once I got to middle school, that's just what I did. I wasn’t quite as bad at the cello as I was at baseball, but the conductors wisely parked me near the back of the orchestra where my mediocrity wouldn’t do much damage. I didn’t mind; I was mostly there for the joy of making music alongside other nice kids, and to be part of something beautiful.

Several years ago, I had the opportunity to join a community softball team with the radio station where I'm the Friday morning guest. My first time at bat, I was so excited to connect with the ball that I sprinted to first base... and, well, that was that. My husband found me later curled up on the bed with a heating pad and a tragic expression. "What's the matter?" he asked. I swallowed a sob. "I'm... I'm... FORTY-ONE!" I said, as if that fully explained it.

I had better luck trying cello again as an adult, as part of an amazing music camp for adults called Scor!. Scor provides same kind of musical magic you remember from childhood—just with less pressure and more snacks. Adults travel from all over the country to attend one of their weekly camps. All levels of players are welcome. And no one made me sit in the back.

The real gift we give our kids when they try music or sports isn’t a future in the orchestra or the major leagues—it’s the inside scoop. Because I’ve stood in right field and sawn away in the cello section, I now watch games and concerts like someone who gets them. You don’t have to be good to be part of the team, you just have to show up. If your kids learn this lesson early, they’ll carry it with them forever—heating pad and all.

—Deb